Thursday, June 28, 2012

I have a hard time understanding why I don't have a pool full of money yet.

I had an epiphany the other day. I believe it was inspired by a recent visit to Hamburger Mary's in Milwaukee for HamBingo night. It was pretty much the standard bingo scenario. Except the numbers were being called by a drag queen and she did performances between games. And it was FAAAAABULOUS!

I was sitting at Qdoba when I realized that it would be a much more interesting experience if my taco salad had been made by a drag queen. And then I realized that there isn't ANYTHING that wouldn't be improved by the prescence of a saucy gay in drag.

Think about it.

Funerals, weddings, baptisms, family reunions, garbage collection, Congress, divorce, sporting events, prom, doctor's offices, dentist visits, the DMV.

Imagine each of those things. And then imagine them with a drag queen or two.


Drag queens are like clowns, except not FREAKING TERRIFYING. I don't know about you, but I've never had a nightmare about a drag queen trying to kill me. I've never run screaming for my mommy at the sight of a drag queen. Mostly I'm just jealous that their makeup always looks better than mine.

And that's why I'm pro drag queen. Clowns can go back to hell where they came from.

[A/N: I wasn't going to share this incredible idea with you guys because I was afraid someone would steal it and capitalize off my genius. But then I realized that I don't have any moneyyyyyyyy* and I probably need some financial backing to get this off the ground. So if you're interested in investing in my drag placement service, shoot me an email!]

*Read that as if said by that crazy girl from Toddlers and Tiaras shown below.

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And if you're not sure why on earth I would waste time watching this show, this is why:

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1 comment:

  1. Not much to say, except brilliant. I would never see a clown parade. But a drag queen parade would be awesome.