Wednesday, May 16, 2012

Cirque du Soleil (sp?) (Also, Boobies) (Oh, and Oprah) (But not Oprah's Boobies)

I hope I spelled "Cirque du Soleil" correctly...considering I do have a degree in French. Kayla has been saying, "VEGAS! VEGAS! VEGAS! VEGAS!"

We leave Sunday morning and we are soooooooo excited. We leave Milwaukee at like 7 AM on Sunday and go through a time loop hole (or however that works), therefore gaining two hours so we should be there at like 9 AM Vegas time. A little later than I had hoped to start drinking, but maybe we can start on the plane. I've previously mentioned that we plan on crashing the 2012 Billboard Music Awards. The awards start at 5 PM so we'll be on the red carpet (or at least within two miles of it) a few hours before that. Then, I plan to yell the wrong name at various celebrities. That is sooooo much more likely to get their attention than using the right name. This is brilliant; I don't know why no one has thought of it before. Though, I should clarify that I will yell the wrong name UNLESS we see R.K. Follesé from Hot Chelle Rae. Then I will scream like a seven year old girl and began sobbing uncontrollably as I yell how much I love him and want to have his babies. And that´s saying a lot given that I don´t want children. But I just love him so much. He looks so good in a tank top. I mean how many guys really look good in a tank top? Yum.

Anyways, this post was supposed to be about Cirque du Soleil (By the way, that means Circus of the Sun. Seeeeee, my degree isn't completely worthless!), but I don't remember what my point was.


Oh yeah! We are going to see Cirque du Soleil Sunday night. They have 17 Cirque shows in Vegas. Okay, they actually have four shows, but did we learn nothing about dramatic effect? Kayla (which I just tried to spell with a "C." Thankfully I caught it before I published this post so you didn't see how special I am.) said that we are going to see Cirque du Soleil O. Upon learning this I immediately became very excited, because I love Oprah! I expressed my excitement to Kayla and she told me that, unfortunately, Oprah is not the star of this show. This is upsetting, but it's also just plain bad business! Do you know how much people would pay to see Oprah twirling around in the air while interviewing celebrities (who would also be twirling around in the air) and giving away stuff?

"You get tickets to the booby show! And you get tickets to the booby show! And you get tickets to the booby show!"

[You should know that I just Googled both "booby show" and "titty show" to determine which is more commonly used. It's "titty show," but I have an Eskimo friend (who may actually be a mix of Asian* and something else and not actually Eskimo at all) who despises the word "tit" so I decided to stick with "booby."]

Also, I'M GOING BLOND TONIGHT! This may or not be related to my current one-third life crisis.

*I'm 92% sure she's Japanese and something European, but, despite the nature of this blog (and the numerous times that I've referred to Guest Blogger Emily as "Oriental"), I don't really want to label this friend (not to be confused with Emily) as the incorrect variety (is it okay to say "variety?") of Asian.


  1. Good to know. I shall retain that information for future use, my Asian of the Chinese genre friend.

    Also, why did my phone just autocorrect "good" to "good good?" it is either in a better mood than I am or it is a cynical bastard. Or something completely different. I'm not very good at psychoanalysing my phone. :/